Which gets me all fired up about something someone said last week......I was called arrogant and self righteous......Obviously you just don't know my heart very well if you're gonna say those things. One should probably know the definition of both of those words before using them Arrogant: having or showing an exaggerated opinion of one's own importance, merit, ability, etc;
And then we have self righteous: confident of one's own righteousness, especially when smugly moralistic and intolerant of
the opinions and behavior of others.
So for starters, for one to be Arrogant you have to Exaggerate ones capabilities. I don't exaggerate my capabilities. If I say I can do something, I can do it. Yeah, I might be a bit cocky about it, a bit proud. I'm great at cooking, I can play guitar ok, and I'm generally very good at soccer. I don't proclaim to be the best at it, but I'm better than almost everyone else, and I'm not afraid to say so. This is confidence, Confidence in my abilities. Confident that if I'm asked to perform a task involving one of these things I will be able to do it, and usually exceed expectation. Now If I start talking about what I bad ass bowler I am, how utterly ripped I am, or that I can perform magic, you can call me arrogant, because I am not any of those things. That would be exaggerating my abilities.
And to call me self righteous............I don't even think I can use the word Righteous in a sentence anymore. To still dwell on something as whether or not you're righteous seems so small and insignificant as to almost be beyond fathoming to me. And to say I'm intolerant of others opinions.......well lemme just say if you knew how not true that was, you'd be embarrassed. I'm not even positive I'm right about what I believe, but its working for me, and who are you to say that its not? or that its wrong? You can't, and I wouldn't bother listening even if you thought it was your place.
Okay, now that I got all of that off my chest and out of my system....Yesterday was V-day. I love valentines day. I love romance, and feeling sappy, and showing someone that you care for them. I know people hate on the day, everyday should be valentines day, etc.... Well then everyday should be Christmas, and Thanksgiving, and 4th of July! I mean really. Its a day that we have made special, just like all the other days. You should celebrate Jesus birth everyday, Be thankful everyday, and remember your freedom every day too. But you don't hear people whine and complain and hate on those holidays. Well you do a bit at christmas, but don't get me started on that. You don't wanna hear it hahahaha oi vey. Anyways, I love valentines day, and love that we have a holiday that we celebrate that someone special to us.
However, as a single person, its hard to get into the spirit for it a lot of the times. We don't really have anyone to share it with like others do. We don't get presents, chocolate in the shape of a heart, roses, kisses, or someone to share our day with....... I always just celebrate love on V-day since I'm not in a relationship, celebrate what love does to our hearts, how it works, how it moves us to do the craziest things, and holds us fast in the fiercest of storms. I love love. Anyone who knows my heart knows how much I say that, and how true it is. Its my favorite thing on earth. Love, in all of its aspects.
But having all that love welled up in my heart makes it just ache, which is when I do what God has told me to do. Cast my cares upon Him right? So I do just that, I ask the Spirit to come and take my heart, my emotions, all of my love that I've stored up for that person, and to take it. I know He will give it back when the time is right, but Its honestly just way too much for me to bear. Its literally like holding a hot potato. Someone throws you one, and you can only hold it for so long before it burns you......I have to give it up before it burns me.
So I do that. I give all of this love, and emotion, this angst and burning desire to not be alone, I give it to you Spirit. To take and store and remove from me until the time is right. Cause literally, I don't want it. I can't hold it, I can't do anything with it, and keeping it bottled up is destroying me inside. So I give it to you, do with it whatever you want. *smiles* I know I will always have more where that came from.... Amen
